Fangirling is a little splash of color in my dull life
From being a normal kid who only knows how to meet expectations, I transformed into a discreet fan girl who has now a colorful life due to KPop.
Let me brief you with this term.
Warning! Since I am discreet, I never disclose my different side! I am a...
And my relationship status is either...
or 
My emotions are also not stable coz...
and
I can be admitted in a mental institution since I can show different emotions while fan girling. I can be teary eyed at times then kinikilig or excited or even on the verge of fainting.
When I stare at my laptop, I open my Twitter account and have myself update with the happenings in the KPop world. I am easily fixated with the tweets. My mood swings are incredible. My day is affected by the things I read online. I can be lonely, happy or touched in a day.
I realized that fangirling is something that I need to divert myself from stress or depression.
For more than seven years, my dull life is filled with colors. I am not only a KPop fan but a YG stan and Korean drama addict as well.
It was Sandara Park, the Pambansang Krung-krung, who introduced KPop to us. She fortunately landed in YG Entertainment. Thus, we automatically became a Blackjack, 2ne1's official fandom. The debut of 2ne1 sparked because of their songs, Fire and I am the Best. The news about this even became one of the top news in the Philippines. It goes to say that Sandara Park syndrome is still there since her Star Circle Quest days.
The swag of 2ne1 then was incomparable. They broke the usual when it comes to KPop girl group. Bom is a sexy chic with high pitched singing prowess. CL is a good rapper. Dara is a multitasking visual. And Minzy is an incredible dancer. These four qualities are hard to find in a group. The world acknowledge this fact.
And when they came to the Philippines for their All or Nothing concert on May 17, 2014, we did not let it pass. We bought tickets just to see them in flesh.
We waited for hours just to see them. We even brought banners and light stick to have the ultimate KPop feels in Mall of Asia Arena.
The experience reminded us of our 2ne1 collectibles.
We stan Dara because she has a Filipino heart. She did not forget Philippines. She can still speak in Tagalog and she never fails to talk about her life here and also her fans (Parkers) and friends.
I even transformed into a stalker because of her. She frequently visits Philippines due to work and leisure.
We waited for her outside ABS CBN last February 14, 2015 but we failed to take a photo of her since many fans plagued her that she found it difficult to open her camera.
And accidentally...we just had a selfie with James Reid.
Our addiction did not stop there. We planned for a year to go to South Korea and celebrate their 7th anniversary since debut with them. Our visa got approved and we were set to stay in SK from May 17 to 22, 2016. Sadly, a heartbreaking news spread in KPop industry. Minzy did not renew her contract before their 7th anniversary. We cried along with the Blackjacks and YG stans worldwide.
We never imagined that their surprise performance in MAMA 2015 will be their last.
The news came out after Dara and Bom spent quality time in the Philippines. They had fun in an amusement park. We are so happy that Bom finally went out after the drug scandal. Many fans wanted to hug her to let her know that we miss her. They went back to SK with no idea that Minzy will not be part of 2ne1 anymore.
Days after the news, Dara did not show up in her shooting schedules. We were afraid that we might not see her in SK. But before our trip, this photo of Dara and Bom made it online. Their eyes said it all. They cried because of Minzy's sudden decision. We just pacified ourselves that they're trying to move on and keep moving forward.
Came our trip in South Korea. We did not mind sleepless day just to have a glimpse of Dara. We had no idea if she will show up but we kept our hopes up. We conversed with the security guards of Digital Cultural Network in Ilsan. They confirmed that Dara is inside. We did not care if we waited for seven long hours. We just know that we were rewarded then with this selfie.
It was a surreal experience. I talked too much in Tagalog. She smiled and replied in Tagalog as well. We gave her gifts and extended our greetings for their 7th anniversary. We called her ati and unnie. She is a genuine angel sent on earth. Thanks Ati Dara. We love you and 2ne1!
We also grabbed every opportunity to see her during her shooting for Pinoy Boyband Superstar. My sister was so lucky to get her signed shirt and posters.
And we also got to watch her perform "Kiss" live in ABS-CBN compound during the final show of PBS.
And because of 2ne1, we grew to love Bigbang also.
Then, I realized I was a fan of Taeyang even before 2ne1. I recalled playing Wedding Dress on my mind for years. And I did not know he is part of Bigbang. I am just fated to love them.
Here is the proof of our love for them. We bought light sticks of 2ne1 and Bigbang.
We also attended their Bigbang MADE Concert in Manila.
We cried, laughed, screamed, sang and danced along with thousand of VIPs in MOA arena.
And it was a life achievement to grab a hold of each member's memorabilia from different fandoms.
And when the BIGBAND MADE The Movie was screened on Philippine cinemas, we also watched it and cried afterwards. Their messages along with the staff's are so heartwarming that we realized that we made the right decision to stan them.
I never though that I would risk my savings and time for the happiness that KPop particularly 2ne1 and Bigbang can bring into my life.
I just know in heart and mind that this change in me is helping me have a life that is different from others. I do not hurt. I just adore. I do not bash. I just keep an eye on update. These are not me before but I embrace the change of having a more colorful life now.
At present, my sister and I are studying Korean language and will try our luck to work in South Korea not only as an avid fan girl but also a responsible part of our family.
I'm teary eyed reading this. I'm a new fan in KPop world (this year lang) because of Big Bang. And I love the boys so much. Recently lang din ako nakapanuod ng past performances ng 2ne1 and I'm so regretful na bakit ngayon lang???
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